An Open Letter to Every Husband, Brother and Son

Dear Fellow Brother,

I have a lot to get through today but first I want to share with you a scary statistic.

Did you know that Male suicide is 3 times higher than that of Females?

Why is this? This should be alarming to us all. Considering how easy it is supposed to be to be a guy – it is also quite hard.

To be honest – I believe the fact we are told to man up and that emotions are feminine has a lot to do with this statistic.

We are told to toughen up and to be a man. Have some cement and harden up.

Men don’t cry.

So we keep it in.

We don’t talk.

Which in turn means that we don’t learn how to deal with our struggles and more importantly – our emotions. A lot of the time we end up feeling alone and overwhelmed.

 But you’re not in it alone.

We are in this together. We are all brothers. I know we are ‘Blokes’ but it is important to tell your mates and brothers to that if shits going down, that we can talk.

Life can be shit sometimes. But its shitter without your best mates around.

I personally have gone through my ups and downs and I expect there are more to come. That’s kind of how life is really. I would be lying if I said that I hadn’t considered driving my car off a cliff. That I felt consumed by my problems and mental dialogue. I wouldn’t say I have had depression. But I believe its real. What I do know though are these two things;

  1. I never ever wanted to feel like that again

  2. I never want any of my mates to ever feel like that

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness. It takes a strong person to put their hand up when they are drowning in their own thoughts and problems and I am here to tell you there is hope.

I want to share with 50  things I have learnt along the way that helped me. Some you may align with and some you may not. Some are directly related to the above statistic and some are things I wish I knew as a teenager.

I wanted to make it a flowing letter but naturally, it came out in dot points.

So, to every Husband, Brother, Son and Friend I share with you some of the tips, quotes and advice that has helped me:

  1. Respect every female regardless of how they act.

  2. Never hit a woman. Ever.

  3. The first one to get angry loses.

  4. Get up early. Achieve something before the world wakes. Read, run, lift or listen to a podcast. Just get up.

  5. Give to charity/community – but don’t go around telling everyone. Don’t do it for recognition. Do it because it’s the right thing to do.

  6. Do something active – join a sporting team or community gym.

  7. Tell people how you feel. Not just angry feelings – I mean emotions.

  8. Tell your parents that you love them. Honestly – they fed you and wiped your arse when you couldn’t do it yourself.

  9. Write down your goals. Again. And again. And again. It will get easier to be clearer each time.

  10. Hold the door open for people. Not just females but also for your fellow bros.

  11. Go for girls outside your “league”. Because this is the best way to learn that no one is.